Where Are You Christmas?

 "Where's Christmas this year?", "Are you doing your'e annual party?". The questions keep coming, but the answer is, No. I really have no desire. I've been doing the Punk Rock Santa routine for almost a decade now. I loved it. I loved gifting strangers things and giving everyone a place to go. I love the Christmas Spirit. The problem is that no one else seems share that love anymore.

 I started the yearly X-Mas Bash with my friend Darlington. We started small, having no idea if anyone would come. Singing a few Christmas tunes in our regular sets and wrapping up whatever we could find around the house to give away.

 People loved it. We loved it. It grew. We added bands, I took on the Punk Rock Santa persona. Learned Christmas Carols. Put all my funds into making it bigger. Making sure everyone was fed and making sure everyone left with a gift. 

 It grew bigger. Outgrew the location I was at. People wanted me to charge. I found a place that didn't try to make me monotize it. We moved. It grew again.

 I saved all the spare funds I could get my hands on to make sure it was bigger and better every year. It was no longer gifts from around the house. I hand wrapped tons of presents to give away. Books, Movies, Toys, Comics. Some inexpensive, some very expensive. Did this without sponsors every year. Other than some gifts donated for contest prizes this all came from me.

 I decorated the entire building. To the point of physical collapse. A few friends would help. Clean up would come and everyone would bail. All the trash left behind. People get something they weren't interested in and just throw it away. Gifts thrown on the floor. Items that cost $60 or more just thrown in the trash. Someone came in to the building and pull out my sound equipment I packed waiting for when I could get help to move it and drank the remainder of my alcohol days after the party. 

 This last year my friend had a meltdown on stage. Caused drama and told me to "Just go enjoy my party", as if I've ever had time to enjoy it. I'm hosting and making sure things run smoothly. Running sound. Stage management. Performing. Decorating. Making sure the catering is going well. Now I'm off schedule an hour and trying to make it work. It's now been a year and my friend hasn't spoke to me since that.

 All of this, other monotized "Punk Rock Santa" events popping up that I have no involvement in, people rudely yelling "Where's the presents?" when I play a Christmas song. Why would I want to do this anymore? That's why I ask, "Where are you Christmas?". Someone please show me there are people who still care...